The Costom Of The Malay’s Weeding
1.Mandi Berlimau
(ceremonial bathing after marriage).
Before bathing ceremony, in the early moning, after the night of consummation, the emak pegantin asks the bridegroom for concrete proof of the bride’s virginity. The bridegroom customarily hand over a white handkerchief which bears the required evidence.The emak pengantin then shows the handkerchief, first to the parents of the bride, abd then most important of all, to the parents of the bridegroom. Proof of the bride’s virginity was of utmost importance to Muslims generality. It was so important that its absence always gave rise to great trouble that often resulted in and immediate divorce. Although the adapt is less widely observed today there are still a good number of Malays who instist on the practice[1].
picture of ceremony mandi berlimau
materials such as beluru, leaf limau purut, limau nipis for 'mandi berlimau'
· After both the groom’s and the bride’s parents have been fully satisfied as to the purity or “honour” of the bride, the mandi-mandi ceremony can take place.The husband and wife are again dressed in their best attire and seated again on the pelamin before a group of guests from among the relatives, neighbours and close friends of both the families of the groom and the bride. After sitting thus for ten to fifteen minutes. They are led down and seated on a bench or two chairs in a hall or room in the house, where the token ceremonial bath is carried out by the emak pegantin. It consists of sprinkling both the groom and the bride with water of sintok (bark of tree, used for cleaning hair) and limau purut (medicinal lemon). After the ceremony has been completed, the groom leads the bride back to the bridal chamber, each holding on one end the bridal chamber, each holding on to one end of the handkerchief.The sarong used by both the husband and wife in the ceremony are given away to the emak pegantin, not only as gifts but as tolak bala and buang geroh (repelling misfortune and harm).That was the adat that used to be observed and adhered to, but these days the whole mandi-mandi ceremony is being discarded by most malays, particularly those in the urban areas, though in the rural areas it is still practised by the die-hards[2]
2.0 Sambut-menyambut
(the bride’s first visit to the groom’s home and her return to her own home).
· On the day of the bathing ceremony a kenduri is held in the bride’s house. Meanwhile her husband and his parents take her on her first visit to their house.There another feast or kenduri is held, to which some hundreds of men and women are invited. Sometimes day and night entertainment of local music and dancing, such ad ether joget and makyong or both are held to entertain the bride. After remaining for a few days in her husbands house, the wife accompanied by her husband and her husband and her own parents, returns to her house, where the couple will live, at least for a few months[3].
